Thursdays are my day in the office.
The administrative aspects of life require the most discipline of me which is why, in addition to seeing clients, I also spend time on Thursdays doing classic office kind of things: administration, emails, schedule, lists, phone calls, future plans. I don’t do any kind of reading, research or writing on these days-that is too deep for me on days that I see clients. I do, however, feel capable of managing some of that shallow work that doesn’t take too much of my brain but MUST be done. I am rekindling a relationship with my to-do list and this is a good day of the week to check some things off.
For the most part, Thursdays are dedicated to meet one-on-one with clients in this cozy little office. When I am meeting with someone my goal is to be as present as possible. Sometimes I need to prepare for these sessions, often I have notes that I need to record after sessions, but for the actual time we are meeting, I try to be as there as I can be, with my whole self.
What does it mean to be present?
During a training I attended last winter, we did a guided meditation where we had to think of someone we did not have a complicated relationship with. A relationship where we did not feel any judgement or criticism toward or from the other. All of us were struggling to find that person so finally the moderator suggested our dog, or a bird, or a tree. We laughed. Nature is so generous to us, accepting us just as we are. He asked us to sit in that feeling of just being with someone/thing–not needing to change them or us, simply seeing and noticing and enjoying that feeling.
When I am in pain or when I am with someone who is in pain, I want to fix it, don’t you? I have spent a lifetime collecting tools to help me with my pain, to help you with your pain. I want to help! I want to make it better! It has been the most ironic discovery to understand that I can’t help until I stop trying to help. The best gift I can give anyone, including myself, is time and space to be right where we are, to learn from life as it is revealing itself to us and to trust that something bigger is at work before, during and after our unknown next step.
May you sit in the presence of something or someone who accepts you just as you are and enjoy every second.